I turned
around the other day and realized that things have changed around here. We are
in our 2nd month of school and as I watch the kids each settle into their
new school year, this year in particular feels like the beginning of a new
phase. It’s not hard to figure out why this year feels like a bigger change
than others. Patrick started Sr High School and now goes off in his senior
uniform. The realization that after this there are only 2 more school years
until he is off to university is a very hard thing to wrap my head around. I’m
so excited for him but at the same time can’t imagine a day when he isn’t here
with us all the time. Kellen started Kindergarten and has settled in so
quickly. He is so pleased with himself to have homework like his big brother,
he beams when he makes progress on his reading, and he now has a little group of
boys he has fallen in with. Then there is little miss Ella, she started
preschool two full days and week and as the preschool teacher says “she has
blossomed”, in other words her personality and desire to be the centre of
attention has exploded over the last 2 months. But it isn’t just the kids this
time, I feel like I have changed and have entered into a new phase too. I’ve
started doing some part time consulting work and it feels amazing!
I know our
new phase isn’t very dramatic, we are going from babies and toddlers to young
kids, but it is a big change. I’ve realized that I haven’t bought diapers or
pull ups in a long time. I no longer feel the need to carry an overflowing bag
everywhere I go, if I have wipes on me it’s a bonus not a necessity. Getting in
the car everyone is using actual seatbelts no more 5 point harnesses which is a
small victory in my book. It is also small things I don’t always recognize in
the moment but then in retrospect realize how nice it is to have. I can now say
everyone put on their shoes and everyone can go find appropriate shoes and put
them on. All 3 kids can work together to pick up the playroom and it actually
ends up clean. In so many little ways things are getting easier. The flip side
is I’ve noticed the battles I do have seem to be getting more difficult. As
Ella’s personality ‘blossoms’, as they like to say at preschool, her wilfulness
just increases. The two of us go to battle all day every day and I’m scared to
think that I have about 20 more years of this ahead of me. Today the battle was
over fruit snacks and ended when she threw her glass of milk onto the floor and
I marched her to her room… Kellen seems to be doing so well in school but
when he does waiver my heart breaks for him. He has to do news every Thursday
when he gets up in front of the class and tells them his news. Standing in
front of the class and speaking is so far the hardest thing for him about school
and watching how nervous he gets is terrible, but then seeing him so proud
after school is comforting. The thought of Patrick driving now that he is 16 is
so scary. I think back to when I was 16 and allowed to drive to and from
school, to my activities, out with friends, and I think my parents must have
been sick worried all the time. I want him to do these things but don’t want
him to do them either. We are definitely entering a new phase of worries and
frustrations.
With Kellen
in school 5 day and Ella in 2 days I figured I would have all this free time I
didn’t have before. I’ve learned that school 5 days means your time is taken up
with drop offs and pickups and then trying to fit everything else into the
space in between. We also have to move all of our regular activities to after
school time so we are busier than ever. I also wanted to do something for
myself with the 2 days I have kid free. Through networking with some of the
moms I have met I was connected with a company that provides exit, stay, and on
boarding interviews to their clients. They hire contractors as independent consultants
so I had to get a business number and was hired on a consultant to do interviewing
for them. So far it is great, I am able to schedule my work around my own availability
and once I’ve filled my available time I don’t have to take on any more work,
or if I have more time available for whatever reason I can
schedule more interviews and bill more hours. I’ve enjoyed it so far, I’ve been
assigned multiple law firms, a pharmaceutical company and two large mining
companies. I am talking to different people who do different types of work and
it has been really interesting. I’m enjoying having something to focus on outside
of the stay at home mom realm I’ve been in for almost 4 years now. It gives me
an outside focus and I will actually be earning some money. It’s already
burning a hole in my pocket, I have a list of really exciting things I want to
go out and indulge in. I think a trip to the new Williams-Sonoma that opened
near us is on the agenda. I started going through the interview process with
Apple for a recruiter position they are hiring here in Sydney and while there
is something really exciting about the chance to go back full time, work in the
city, and make a full salary. The thought of going form home full time to never
home was just too much. In the end the role wasn’t a good fit and it helped me
realize that I’m not ready to go back full time but working part time and
getting to work while still being home full time is perfect for me right now.
So we are
changing over here. Some things are getting easier and other things are getting
harder. The kids are gaining their independence little by little and I am too.
